The funniest jokes the internet has to offer.
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Did you hear about the time traveling surgeon who can transplant any body part to an eighties soundtrack?
She got Bette Davis Eyes.
A man goes to the doctor and tells the doctor
"Please doc you have to help me. Everywhere I touch my self it hurts. If I touch my leg, ow that hurts, if I touch my arm, ow that hurts. If I touch my head ow that hurts. Doctor looks him over and asks him " Sir where are you from?" The guys says "I from Newfoundland" The Doctor says "Son your fingers broken!"
They say eating nuts gives you energy and focus in your thinking…
Does that mean eating almonds gives you post-nut clarity?
Thousands of people have made it to the finals of the world limbo championship
Apparently the bar was set too high
Breaking news
Vladimir Putin will marry his long term girlfriend Eva in a private ceremony in the air defense bunker underneath the Kremlin on April 29th. A policy announcement will follow soon after.
At first, I wanted rid of my Hemorrhoids…
but the Doctor says they’ve grown attached to me.
When are men the smartest?
During sex. Thats when they are connected to the main computer.
A girl in a nudist colony had problems with fashion...
Nothing looked great on her!
Greeks vs Italians
Sure, it was the Greeks who invented sex. But Italians were the first ones to introduce it to women
Just a fun science joke
If the eigenvalue of a Hermitian operator representing the Hamiltonian of a quantum system is degenerate, the system can exhibit non-trivial topology due to Berry phases, which can be characterized using topological invariants such as Chern numbers