Things better not to say - random entries

Oh... oh... I thought you were paying!

How do you call a man with boobs?
A booby trap.

How did the Irish expatriate get lost in the jewelry megastore?
He was looking for the emerald aisle.

How many carbs do people in india eat while dieting?
Naan.

If red birds make red babies, blue birds make blue babies, and black birds make black babies; what birds make no babies?
Swallows

A Scotsman, an Englishman and an Irishman attend a conference on international relations…
…and wait patiently for the Welsh delegate to arrive.

Why did the chicken cross the road?
To go to McDonald’s to buy a McNugget for it’s friends

Me: hi do you take walk-ins?
The morgue: what

A beer always fits between the liver and the kidneys.

What did Vin Diesel say when he was asked to describe Pitch Black?
"Its riddick-ulous."

What did the bullet do after getting fired?
It went ballistic.

What the heck, the championship trophy looks shit anyway!

Im sick and tired of all the reposts.
Let’s get some new content and jokes in this sub. Even if we have to steal them from someone else.