Things better not to say - random entries
... Jokes ...“Correcting killed the cat,” said a stranger standing next to a man.
“No, that was curiosi…” a loud bang and flash of light silenced him quickly
I got this from my 12yo cancer patient as I was rounding today...
How do you put an elephant in a Safeway bag?
You take the f out of safe and the f out of way.
On a scale of zero to infinity, how can you tell a joke in this sub is original?
It’ll be the zero.
... to a Vegetarian ...Prince Andrew left Balmoral,
returning to Wales where where he is now consoling minors, miners! He’s consoling miners.
Dateline GOTHAM CITY, December 24th:
Alarms went off this evening when Batman was booked for a possible DUI after leaving the City Hall Christmas Soirée. The caped crusader tore out the entire steering column on his heavily modified sports car while driving recklessly in pursuit of The Joker, who fled the area. Officers noted that he “reeked of peppermint schnapps” but refused to submit to a breathalyzer at the scene. Robin had left the party early with a beautiful young woman whom he had been teasing, and was not in the vehicle when in it crashed.
In short:
Jingle Bells, Batman Smells, Robin laid a Neg, Batmobile lost its wheel, and the Joker ran away.
... at School ...Watch ProSieben daily and learn during the commercial break. In this way, you get up to 9 hours of learning time per day. Sad but true.
Our local pizza guy has been arrested for selling drugs
I have been a loyal customer for years. I honestly had no idea he was selling pizzas
What did Kim Jong Un say when, under his leadership, his country successfully built a nuclear weapon?
"This the proudest moment of my Korea"
I was going to cook an alligator for dinner...
But realised I only had a croc pot.
... at a Date ...