Things better not to say - random entries
... Jokes ...I was at a wedding reception…
When I noticed the woman sitting opposite me kept staring until finally she spoke.
“Every time you smile, I want to take you back to my place”
In my excitement I asked if she was single.
“No” she replied. “I’m a Dentist”
I wish people would enunciate more
I really need to know if you want little Caesar’s or little seizures
Two attractive women were talking...
1. Hey, I had a great time last night, I slept with a Brazilian.
2. OMG, how many is a brazilian?
What’s the difference between 3 cocks and a joke?
Your mom can’t take a joke!
My Nazis knock knock joke. KNOCK KNOCK! Who’s there?
+SLAP+ Ve vill ask der questions! (Lord I apologize for the comment section)
I was dating a woman who said she was a divercee, but then she told me she was never married.
Turns out, she was divorced from reality.
A guy walks into a bar and asks for fruit punch
The bartender says they have it, but he has to enter the line for the fruit punch. The guy looks around but sees nothing except a window. Outside, he sees two drums and a cymbol fall from a mountain. Ba dum tssss.
If you’re curious about the original setup, don’t worry, there was no punch line.
Why was the hockey player suspended for tripping?
Because the league has a zero-tolerance policy on LSD.
Saw a trans
I saw a trans in a miniskirt and thought "shows a lot of balls "
I wonder how short shorts feel about being called short..
I bet they feel minimized