Hush

Things better not to say - random entries

... Jokes ...

How do you spot a Redditor?
You don’t need to. Once they’re finished covering their ear and tapping the back of their head, they’ll tell you.

... Jokes ...

Who ever stole my coffee and Microsoft office...
I will find you! You have my word.

... Jokes ...

My wife demanded to know why our rubbish was scattered all over the road.
I wanted to keep it a secret, but I ended up spilling the bins.

... Jokes ...

so a man walks into a bar with a monkey
i forgot the rest of the joke, but your mother’s a whore.

... Jokes ...

Some people say that Coroners don’t talk much.
I’ve always found them excellent at getting people to open up.

... Jokes ...

What platform does the joker listen to the radio on?
WhySoSeriousXM

... Jokes ...

I tried to join the Marines.
But I fell short of their physical requirements. So they put me in the Navy since I was a sub-marine.

... at Facebook ...

My head cinema deserved an Oscar.

... Jokes ...

I read the first 4 Harry Potter books as a fan of the series
By the time the 5th book came out … I was dead Sirius about it

... Jokes ...

what is the difference between a good joke and a bad
joke timing

... Jokes ...

Chuck Norris got ambushed by terrorists with a $5,000,000 ransom
If the money wasn’t paid within 24 hours, the terrorists would be beheaded

... Jokes ...

A father and son were taking a walk in the countryside
The father points into the next field and says “hey look, there’s a big flock of cows over there” the son replies in a rather quizzical and confused tone “heard of cows dad…” to which the dad replies Of course I’ve heard of cows. There a whole flock of them over there.

... Jokes ...

what is red and smells like blue paint?
..... ..... Red paint