Things better not to say - random entries
... Jokes ...What do you call an illogical joke about Indian food ?
What do you call an illogical joke about Indian food
A naan sequitur
Too soon?
How did the FBI know about the rest of the classified info at Mar-A-Lago?
They went to Jared.
Did you know that when you shoot different guns the smoke smells different?
For example a pistol won’t have a strong smell since it’s tiny.
An Assault rifle would smell like a lot of gun powder for how fast the bullets come out.
And apparently shotguns smell like teen spirit
Little Johnny doing Math
The math teacher asks Little Johnny: “If I give you 3 cats, and then another 3 cats, and then again another 3 cats, how many cats would you have?”
Little Johnny responds: “ten.”
Teacher: “Ok… that’s not correct, let’s do this again. But pay attention this time. If I gave you 3 cats, and another 3 cats and then another 3 cats, how many cats would you have?”
Little Johnny responds again: “Well… ten.”
The teacher, becoming slightly frustrated, tries a different way: “let’s try another example. If I gave you 3 oranges, then another 3 oranges, and then again another 3 oranges, how many oranges would you have?
Little Johnny: “Well, 9.”
Teacher, happier, responds: “That’s correct. Now if I gave you 3 cats, and another 3 cats and another 3, how many cats would you have?”
Johnny: “Ten!”
Teacher: “Little Johnny, how did you even calculate 10?”
Little Johnny: “Because I already have a cat at home!”
Told my daughter while learning to drive, to drive like Chewbacca.
Always be wookin
What is the hardest part of being a vegetarian?
Eating vegetables.
...What is the hardest part of eating a vegetable?
The wheelchair.
It’s been tough on our family since we found out Grandpa is addicted to viagra.
Grandma has been taking it especially hard.
Beaver 1: “Sir, the river is running at full capacity with no obstruction!”
Beaver 2: “Dammit!”