Things better not to say - random entries

What’s the difference between a corn farmer with allergies and a prostitute with diarrhea?
One shucks between fits.

What do you call a Pirate that pisses on people?
Arrrrrrgh Kelly

I wrote a sixty four word joke
HAMILTON WROTE THE OTHER FIFTY ONE

Did you guys hear about the kidnapping that happened at the downtown school??
Everything turned out fine after he was woken up

How many celebrities died in 2022?
Yes

My girlfriend ran naked into our yard to see a tornado
It was just the clam before the storm

It all makes sense now
Jack: Rose! There’s enough room, you can save me! Rose: There’s one thing you should know about me Jack. I’m actually 26 years old! Jack: … Rose: Jack? Jack: *drifts away into the dark depths of the ocean*

What sound does a nazi make when sneezing?
AHHH JEWWW!

Why was 1 afraid of 3?
Because 382.

For the participation award, they gave me a tiny box of Lego
It didn’t satisfy my heart’s contempt, It was in pieces

What do you get when you cross a vampire and a butterfly?
A Blooderfly

What records are always broken in Ireland?
Guinness World Records

People who sell meat for a living are gross ..
But people who sell veg are grocer