Things better not to say - random entries
I used to be a member of the Secret Vegetable Association Cult. But i was banished last week
Because i spilled the beans
So I got cut off at this really fancy bar the other day
The Bartender kept telling me “Dude! This is communion. You can’t be acting like that here”
Keyboard demon
Greg is sitting at his computer browing his favouriye website and a demon pops out from behind his keyboard and proclaims "for I am the almighty keyboard demon! here to steal all your keys" Greg jumps back out of his seat like a shot!
Taking advantage of this, the demon grabs the keyboard and steals the top left key then disappears back behind the keyboard.
Puzzled, Greg lifts the keyboard up and asks the Demon, "If you are almighty? why did you only steal the top left key?"
The demon turns to him with a evil smirk on his face and proclaims, "Now there is no escape!"
The man who invented
The dishwasher was just sick of hearing his wife complain
Why is C the only good letter in the English alphabet?
Because the others are Not-Cs
What did the prison warder say to prisoners after arriving late to a meeting with them?
Sorry to have kept you.
The difference between a hippo and a Zippo?
One is really heavy, the other is a little lighter.
... Jokes ...
... to your Boss ...