Things better not to say - random entries
... Jokes ...Me: “just going to South Manchester to pick up my trousers”
Friend: “Altrincham?”
Me: “No just had them dry cleaned”
NBA athletes are basketball players and social justice activists until the dialogue is about Kyrie Irving
Then they’re just basketball players again
My mother told me my brother was in France to get Hormone Replacement Therapy.
That was how I found out she was abroad.
Why do people usually feel empty inside in the mornings?
Is it the recollection of all the sad and embarrassing moments of their lives during the night that makes them subconsciously loathe themselves even more than they already do which ends up making them feel depressed?
Or are they just hungry?
FDA finally approved the official Anal Condom...
The reason it took this long is because their wives only allowed them to test it on their birthdays and the tests were always abruptly cancelled.
How Can An Italian Actor Guarantee They Win an Academy Award?
Rigatoni
... at Office ...How did he know?
Last year I had prostate surgery. Afterwards, the doctor pointed out that I had a hemorrhoid that I should have checked out. Yesterday, I had cataract surgery on my right eye, and the doctor told me the same thing.
Putin comes to the barber shop.
The barber cuts his hair and asks all the time about Ukraine. How are people doing there? When does the war end?
Putin get nervous:
- You are moved about this Ukraine far too much, right?
- Not at all, sir. For me it is totally indifferent.
- Why do you then constantly ask about Ukraine?
- Because each time that I say Ukraine your hair rises up – and it is easier to cut…
I met the inventor of the windowsill the other day
What a ledge
(Can’t take credit for it just heard it on the radio)