The funniest jokes the internet has to offer.

What do you call an Arabic person who owns a hard drive?

A Terab.

A Husband was doing a crossword puzzle with his wife

Husband: Empathic no, 5 letters Wife: never H: Pistol 3 letters W: gun H: Disgust 3 letters W: ugh H: Charity 4 letters W: give H: Female sheep 3 W: ewe H: Pixar Movie 2 W: Up

Once I was almost in love with a psychic

She left me before we met.

What do you call a tree with one toe?

A 123...

The Bayeux Tapestry is not historically accurate

The whole story has been embroidered.

Why did Santa Claus wash his clothes in Tide?

It was too cold out Tide.

Great news! I got the whole plane to myself!

The large group going to the psychics convention all cancelled at the last minute.

Never take a plane with Ben Shapiro

He will destroy the left wing

Went to see a psychic today..

I ran the doorbell then heard a voice from inside say "who is it?" I left.

Did you fall from heaven?

Cause your face is all fucked up

What’s the worst part of thanksgiving dinner in Alabama?

Having to sit around a table with all the people you’ve slept with.

Topical

Someone tried to sell me a box of seaweed this morning. Must be Vraic Friday.

I told my son that I found his hamster in our vacuum cleaner.

With tears in his eyes he said, "Please get a new one, daddy..." "I was thinking the same," I said, "the suction is absolutely terrible."