The funniest jokes the internet has to offer.
New at better-not-say-it.com: Our hot joke section. Have fun laughing with our sensationally funny jokes:
On job applications I put …..
On job applications I put “Can pee with morning wood” under skills. When the employer asks me why I just say “Well because it’s kind of hard”
My friend was bragging his new 3D printer can print a gun.
I wasn’t impressed, I’ve had a Canon printer for years!
3 students at a high school get into trouble and are put on detention after school.
But instead of just sitting in a classroom they are tasked with helping the school Janitor clean the school basement. So they set about clearing the basement. They find loads of old junk, which had accumulated over the 80 years the school had been open. After about an hour of moving boxes full of old text books and other junk. They soon get bored and decide to explore the basement more. They find an old metal locker in the recesses of the huge basement. It looked very old as it was rusty and covered in cobwebs. The 3 students try to open it up. Using all their might they finally get it open after 10 minutes of trying. As they open the locker a cloud of dust comes out, as it settles they see a skeleton. The 3 students scream at the sight of this and run to tell the Janitor. Who upon looking at the skeleton tells the police. The police forensics team come to the school to take some samples of the skeleton and remove it from the school. Back in the lab they are finnaly able to identify the body by the sneakers that are still on the feet of the skeleton. A detective informs the principal about the identity of the skeleton. Rumours about the skeleton had spread across the school in the weeks since it was found. So to quell the hearsay he decides he will announce the news to the whole school. He gathers the whole school into the auditorium and says: "Boys and girls the skeleton that was found in our school basement by 3 of our students has been identified by the police. I can tell you the skeleton was the.....1952 school hide and seek champion"
Joke from 10,000 BC
So there were 3 guys named "**Somebody**", "**Nobody**" & "**Mad**" **Somebody** Killed **Nobody**. Apparently **Mad** saw the event & called 911. Hello ! Somebody Killed Nobody !! 911 : Hey, Are you Mad ?
One year ago today, Bill and Melinda Gates woke up and said to each other
"May divorce be with you."
Why did the Girl Scout leader get kicked out of the troop.
They got caught eating brownies.
My little brother won a goldfish at the local fair. Sadly, the next morning he was floating dead in his little pond.
So now I have to look after the fish.