The funniest jokes the internet has to offer.
New at better-not-say-it.com: Our hot joke section. Have fun laughing with our sensationally funny jokes:
How long do you cook your pasta in Hell?
Until it’s Al Dante! I’m not proud of it. But I still like it.
Did you hear about the guy who escaped being a toilet slave?
He got away scat-free.
I love women with tattoos
It shows a history of poor decision making which generally works in my favor.
A man barged into a confessional booth
He sits down and says “father I need to tell you, last night I was at the bar drinking when a gorgeous woman approached me and we started talking. After flirting together for awhile she asked if I would come back to her place” “Go on” said the priest. “Well, as we were leaving she ran into her good friend who was also very attractive and the woman invited her along as well” “Did you succumb to your temptations, my son” the priest asked?” “Yes, we went to her house and had a wild passionate 3 some for hours. I actually came straight here” The priest thanked him and told him he must pray and ask for forgiveness from God and it will be granted. “Oh, I didn’t come for forgiveness father” the man said, “I’m not even catholic.” The priest then asked “Why are you telling me then?” The man said “Are you kidding me? I’m telling everyone!”
Man with a lisp was arrested today…
…after being caught redhanded stealing from the kitchen section of Bed Bath and Beyond. Upon being interrogated he told the police, “I’m sorry! I can’t help it! The thrill of theft just makes me feel alive. I guess I’m addicted to taking whisks.”