The funniest jokes the internet has to offer.
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Why did the Easter Bunny cross the road?
To get to the other side…but on the third day it returns.
A Bridge Too Far
An Irishman was collecting empty bottles on the beach one day when he found one with a tiny man inside it. He let the man out and for this the tiny man told him that he could have one wish. “I’m dead scared of flying” the Irishman told him “And I get terribly seasick from just looking at a boat and I’ve always wanted to go to England, so I want you to build a bridge across the Irish Sea” ​ “Are you out of your mind” the tiny man exclaimed “Do you know how much work that is. Give me chance man, make another wish” Then the Irishman told the tiny man that he wanted to understand everything women thought and said. The tiny man thought about this for a long time, then he said “Do you want two or four lanes on that bridge”
I was threatened today at the airport.
At the check-in the woman said “window or isle.” I said “window or you’ll what?”
My friend told me he put a potato down his swimming trunks and now the ladies won’t leave him alone…. Didn’t work for me tho….
Apparently you’re supposed to put it down the front
A pig and a chicken are talking on a field.
The chicken says, "Everything is way better with bacon on it!" The pig says, "Oh really?? Everything?" The cow says, "Absolutely!" So the pig sits on him.
This guy walks into the bar and sees a gorgeous blonde sitting on a bar stool all alone.
So the guy sits down next to her and pulls a small box from his pocket. He opens it and there’s a frog inside. The blonde says, “He’s cute, but does he do tricks?” The guy says, “Yes, he licks pussy.” So after talking with her for several minutes, he convinces her to come with him to his apartment. They get there and she takes all of her clothes off, gets into the bed, and spreads her legs. The guy sets the frog right between her legs and it just sits there not moving at all. The blonde says, “Well? What’s up?” The frog still does not move. So the guy leans over to the frog and says, “All right, I’m only going to show you how to do this one more time!”
What math question is impossible for a Chinese person to solve?
What is Tiananmen squared?
MtF sex change
Just the idea of the sex change surgery on myself freaks me out. So I have to commend the bravery of these people that go through with it. That took balls.
The CEO of TikTok testified before Congress today and really had a hard time.
He was trying to explain social media to old people.
Why do people who own magazines have mental health conditions?
Because obviously, they have a lot of issues.