The funniest jokes the internet has to offer.
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Why did Adele cross the road?
To say "Hello" from the other side... ​ (not my fault - stole it from "Tim and Friends")
Queen Elizabeth
After meeting HM Queen Elizabeth II on Tuesday, new Prime Minister Liz Truss has returned the bottle of Novichok to the evidence room in Salisbury police station.
I got fired from my job at the bank today.
A lady asked me to check her balance so I pushed her over.
Preacher
The preacher was wired for sound with a lapel mike, and as he preached loudly, he moved briskly about the platform, jerking the mike cord as he went. Then he moved to one side, getting wound up in the cord and nearly tripping before jerking it again. After several jerks and circles, a little girl in the third pew leaned toward her mother and whispered, If he gets loose, will he hurt us?
A mexican had five sons and gave them all English names
- First son was called Juan - Wait a minute! That’s not an English name!! - Second son was called two, third three and so on…
What did Bo-Peep say to Woody when he caught her f***ing Buzz?
##YOU GOT A FRIEND IN ME!
Habla Ingles?
One of my doctors: Someone who speaks four languages is called quadrilingual. What do you call someone who speaks three languages? Me: Trilingual. Him: Two languages? Me: Bilingual. Him: What about one language? Me: American. Him: *laughs that I get the joke*