The funniest jokes the internet has to offer.

Dwayne Johnson is ANTI "Rock and Roll"

He avoids the Carbs

How do Germans tie their shoes?

They tie them into little Nazis.

In her will, Her Royal Highness, The Queen, ask that her eyes be left open until after she is lowered into her grave.

She wanted to see her family letting her down one last time.

Every overcooked a Hawaiian pizza?

Should have put it on aloha temperature

Putin is not all bad

He is expected to greatly decrease the incidence of gaslighting across Europe.

Did you hear about the guy who wrote his will on his cock?

It wouldn’t stand up in court.

How do you turn root beer into beer?

Put it in a square cup!

Which James Bond had the shiniest hair?

Timotei Dalton

I am demisexual

I give only half a fuck to everything

I think understand why me and my partner are such a good match.

I get excited when I smell food and become super alert when the doorbell rangs. My girlfriend Shelley becomes ecstatic when she sees a person who she just saw 5 hours ago.

My body is a temple

My liver is a battlefield

I’ve been carrying a gun with me every since an attempted robbery a few years ago

Since then my robberies have been very successful!

I thought Covid-19 was a cleaning product.

Everyone was calling it the Boomer Remover.