The funniest jokes the internet has to offer.

I’m really sad my pet wildebeest died:(

I had to get a Gnu one

Jesus redeems sinners…

… for valuable cash prizes

So, I found proof of the Second Coming of Jesus on a ancient piece of fabric….

Now I gotta wash my hands, and take a cold shower.

What do you call a fish that wears a bowtie?

Sofishticated.

I love you honey pie, my wife said earlier. And I love you tons, I replied.

What, no nickname for me? She asked. Sometimes I swear she’s going deaf.

[First Date] Her: I’m usually attracted to men with power.

Me: That’s great, I always pay my electric bill on time.

Did you hear about the new airline pilot contract? You will only have to work on Tuesday!

‘some guy in the back raises his hand’ “Every Tuesday?”

A weasel walks into a bar..

The bartender says Wow I’ve never served a weasel before, what can I get you? Pop goes the weasel.

feis is not an internet meme

Fair enough I suppose

what do people who like pickles on burgers call the act of masturbation?

gherkin off

What method of payment does the Pope use when shopping online?

PayPal.

Why was the kale bulletproof?

It was carrying a diet shield

My friend threw a bottle of omega-3 capsules at me but I wasn’t really injured

Thankfully, they were super-fish-oil injuries