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What was The Mountain’s favorite fast food restaurant?

Popeyes

i have been chasing a criminal who murders at railway stations

i think i am on the right track

Vladimir Putin just wrote a new song

Russia referred to it as a “Special Musical Operation”

How many Fu** Boys does it take to change a light bulb?

It is a trick question, as they are still using gas lighting.

In online chatting,if a girl says she is 18,she is probably 16

If she tells she is 16,she is probably 14 If she tell she is 14, He is probably 52

What’s the opposite of being able to wrap your head around something?

A turban :D (This joke is open source for anyone to repost without giving credit)

Pharmacy Break-In

Two men broke into a drugstore and stole all the Viagra. The police put out an alert to be on the lookout for the two hardened criminals.

During dinner, I told my wife, “I used to be grapes.”

Her: Huh? Me: Sorry. It must be the wine talking.

I forgot to check if my ketchup bottle’s cap was tightened…spilled everywhere.

Ah well, Heinz sight is 20/20.

Did you know Paul walker was a hippie?

Yeah, he was quite the tree hugger

Yo mama so big she could dock a U-boat inside her, with room to spare.

Yeah, loose fit for this sub.

There are only two things certain in life

Meth and Texas

I love giving headphones to people as gifts

But without the phones of course

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