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The funniest jokes the internet has to offer.

New at better-not-say-it.com: Our hot joke section. Have fun laughing with our sensationally funny jokes:


My dentist told me my teeth were grinding at night.

I told him, "I wish I were motivated enough to grind through the night".

If a snake and an undertaker got married, what would their towels say?

Hiss and hearse

Lately they said many kids went missing in my neiborhood....

welp, better lock up the ones I stocked up in the basement before they went missing too!

My ex girlfriend suddenly invited me out of the blue to a bar and promised to show me a good time.

When I got there, she ran the 100 metres in less than 15 seconds.

Why did the chicken cross the road?

To be a free run chicken.

What do ghosts say when they hear bad comedy?

BOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!!!!!

This one time in band camp…

Well, you know how it goes…

How many sexist does it take to change a light bulb?

none, they let the woman make sandwich in the dark

why dont Americans pick up their phones?

Because they like to let freedom ring.

What did the guy in the bank say to the bank taller?

Leave me A loan

A man and his wife are shopping together.

The man puts a case of beer in the cart and she says “Put that back on the shelf!” So they continue shopping and the wife puts face cream in the cart and he asks “What the hell do you need that for?” The wife says “It makes me look pretty!” The husband replies”So does the beer and it’s on sale for half price!”

How Did The Frog Sell A Million Books?

Because his story was so ribbiting!

My mum was a wonderful woman.

Despite being lay on her death bed, her dying words were “be positive”. She was an inspiration, always spreading love until the end; I love you mum. It’s such a shame she couldn’t tell us what her blood type was for the transfusion…

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