The funniest jokes the internet has to offer.

What is K?

A dry text from a bad partner.

Q. What did the French trademark lawyer say to his wife?

A. Je^(TM) (Je t’aime)

What do a wife and an old car have in common?

It’s hard to get them to turn over on a cold morning

Apple had to stop spying on its competitors...

...they had a lack of Intel.

Word of advice to all the men out there: DO NOT masturbate after chopping up some chilies.

Not only does it sting but it will also get you kicked off Masterchef.

I asked a German girl if Germans are afraid of numbers

She said 9

What do you call a photographer who take pictures of groups of fish?

a school shooter

I used to think there was no way China could get spy equipment into America

Turns out, I was just a balloonatic.

Which monster is best at paying attention to a speech?

Mummies. They sit there rapt.

It wasn’t easy for the guy who invented the microphone in the beginning.

He got some really bad feedback.

Why all Americans are stupid?

-Those who want to learn and go to school will get shot

I don’t like eating rabbit

I always get hare stuck in my teeth

To be or not to be…

Is the difference between having your ass beaten and having…