The funniest jokes the internet has to offer.
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As I was introducing my family to our new neighbors, the guy exclaimed, “Wow! Your wife and daughter look like twins!” I chuckled and said...
“Well, they *were* separated at birth!"
A witch was flying on her broom when she noticed that all the witches she passed were flying on vacuum cleaners.
She thought to herself, "Am I the only one who still drives a stick?"
I got charged way more than I was quoted for a new set of tires!
They said it was due to inflation.
I heard fall guys season 1 is now "free for all"
Just got word season 2 will be, "Make em pay!"
(Pickup Line) Hey girl are you a school?
because I wanna shoot some kids inside you
Rick Moranis
Actor Rick Moranis is trying to make a big comeback in the acting world and I’m not about to let that happen. Most people forget that he shrunk his fucking kids and didn’t go to jail.
I am so unlucky in love.
I asked a blind woman for a date last week, and she said she was seeing someone.