The funniest jokes the internet has to offer.
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Here come the downvotes
What did the unicorn say to the Iranian Gynecologist? Nothing. Iranian Gynecologists are mythical creatures and don’t exist in real life.
Did you hear about the fight between Chuck Norris and Superman?
The loser had to wear their underwear on the outside
This moment…
when you see a black guy walking across the street with a TV and you think „Hey, dont I have the same?!“ but you than remember yours is at home cleaning your shoes.
Which would you rather be?
Given up, let down, hurt, made to cry, be told good bye or deserted?
I am writing a thesis on how plants create oxygen.
There is only text and no photos-ynthesis.
A man’s wife asks him to return a library book for her—
He says sure, he’s doing a bunch of errands anyway so he adds the library as an extra stop to his day. When he gets there, he approaches the counter and says “Excuse me miss, I’d like to return this book.” The young lady behind the counter gives both the man and the book a funny look. “This book?” she says, picking it up. “Yes,” says the man. “I’ll also take care of any late fees. Apologies from my wife, she said she meant to return it quite awhile ago.” “Sir,” says the young lady. “This isn’t a library book.” “What?” says the man, confused. “What do you mean?” “I mean, look at it!” says the lady. “There’s no stamp on it, no laminate covering, there isn’t even a check-out card in the back. This is clearly a book that your wife purchased or had given to her. You should bring it back.” By now the man was embarrassed. How was he supposed to know what a library book looked like? He was far too busy of a businessman to go to libraries. “Well my wife doesn’t want it,” he says. “She insists that it IS a library book and she wants it returned. Is it possible for me to just donate it?” “Oh I’m sure you could, if you wanted to!” says the lady. “Perfect,” says the man. “Well then miss, I would like to donate this book to this library.” “Sir,” says the young lady. “This is a Wendy’s.”
How many introverts does it take to change a lightbulb?
Why does it have to be a group activity?
A guy walks into a bar and orders 6 shots of tequila
He slams them all back and says “You know, I really shouldn’t be drinking with what I’ve got.” The bartender asks “Why? What have you got?” The guy replies “2 dollars.”