The funniest jokes the internet has to offer.
New at better-not-say-it.com: Our hot joke section. Have fun laughing with our sensationally funny jokes:
Why does Ms. Pacman feel violated when Pacman is chasing her…
Because he keeps trying to eat her cherries.
I heard Putin was installing Windows
And Microsoft had to accept his terms and conditions.
I heard that the word "mile" comes from the Roman term for "thousand paces"
Then wtf is a nautic mile?
A blond cop pulled over a blond and asked for ID
The blond said, “ What’s ID?” The blond cop said, “It’s the thing in your purse with your picture on it.” The blond gave her compact mirror to the blond cop, who said, “I’m sorry. If I knew you were a cop, I would not have pulled you over.”
Met a guy at the bar last night who looked a bit down
I asked him “what’s up man you look a bit down” He said “I’ve just be diagnosed with the big C” I said “Cancer?” He said “No dyslexia”
Guy is backing out of a parking space and accidentally hits a car behind him
Guy who’s car got hit says “even I’m better than you at pulling out, and I got 3 kids!”
What do you call a short person who escaped from prison and can talk to the dead?
A small medium at large.
My teachers told me I’d never amount to much since I procrastinate so much.
I told them, “Just you wait!”
What do flags and my penis have in common?
They both stand at half mast when somebody dies.