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The funniest jokes the internet has to offer.

New at better-not-say-it.com: Our hot joke section. Have fun laughing with our sensationally funny jokes:


I like my women how I like my coffee

Ground into pieces and boiled in water

What do women and food adverts have in common?

They both don’t look like their photos

I fell asleep with my hand in my pants...

I dreamed I was driving a truck. My wife kept making beeping noises.

Why did the chicken cross the road?

It was filleted and in a shopping bag.

A man loses three fingers in a horrific work accident

He asks the doctor if he’ll be able to drive with that hand.. The doctors says… Maybe, but I wouldn’t count on it..

Blonde Joke.

Guy says to a Blonde girl. I bet I can guess when you were born just by fondling your tits, no way says the Blonde, go on then, so 20 minutes later the Blonde says OK when was I born? Guy says: Yesterday.

Why did Dolly Parton get pulled over by the police on her way to work?

. . She was going 9-to-5!

A Matter Of Punctuation...

An English professor wrote the words, "Woman without her man is nothing" on the blackboard and directed his students to punctuate it correctly. The men wrote: "Woman, without her man, is nothing." The women wrote: "Woman! Without her, man is nothing."

Stop calling me a slut and saying I ride the "cock carousel"

I prefer the term Mary-gets-around

Request: jokes about short people with adhd. I’m going on a date next week and she said she’s heard it all!

I’m sure she has a short memory but I need to learn more jokes!

"What a lovely pair of Blue Tits" said one Bird Watcher to the other

"Will you please shut up!" shouted everyone else at the Avatar 2 screening

What do you call a man with a toilet on his head?

John.

what do you call a group of crows who do something out of curiosity?

A tempted murder

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