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What is the most offensive medication on the market.

Headache meds. No matter what they force me to pick a little cotton before it will fix my headache.

In search of a lost joke.

One of my dads friends as a kid was known for being very unfunny however he had one joke that my dad and his friends remember being hilarious. The only part of the joke anyone can remember is “ Your moms on the corner selling cards 1-10”. This may just be a case of a exaggerated memory but this joke would have been told in the late 80s early 90s.

2 guys have 4 cigarettes on a boat but nothing to light them with so they throw one cigarette overboard

And the boat becomes a cigarette lighter

Where do operas go for training? SINGapore!

ha ha, get it? because operas sing and singapore starts with sing?

Crossing Jokes

What do you get when you cross a spider and a human joint? An Arackneed

just a joke

Now dont be mad at me but just imagine how having sex with a woman with tourette syndrome would be like ?

What sits at the bottom of the sea and twitches?

A nervous wreck

Bought my depressed mate a rabbit for his birthday and he was NOT happy.

He was like “Why the fuck did you buy me a rabbit? What the hell am I going to do with this?” I was shocked. I was convinced it would cheer him up. I replied. “Well, I know you can never truly replace old pets, but your girlfriend said you’d been down ever since you lost your hare”

What do former presidents Ronald Reagan and Bill Clinton have in common?

They both said “screw you” to aid(e)s

Why do Gardeners commit suicide?

Because the grass is always greener on *the other side.*

Me & Her....

**SHE SHOUTED DOWN FROM UPSTAIRS;** "**CAN YOU FEEL A SHOOTING PAIN ACROSS YOUR CHEST AS IF SOMEONE HAS A VOODOO DOLL OF YOU AND IS STICKING PINS IN IT?"** **ME: "NOPE... i FEEL FINE...."** **HER; " HOW ABOUT NOW?....."**

I have a friend who only knows masturbation jokes

He says they cum in handy

I created a group online so that like minded people can share posts and get together to do like minded things

The prosecution lawyers keeps using the word "ring" ..

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