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The funniest jokes the internet has to offer.

New at better-not-say-it.com: Our hot joke section. Have fun laughing with our sensationally funny jokes:


Why does Hitler hate golf?

He always ends up stuck in a bunker

What do you call a snake that works for the government?

A civil serpent.

A woman asked a man what he did for a living

The man says “I work at a bowling alley. “She then asked , “so what do you do at the bowling alley. “He says “I split wood there.” The woman looks confused and says , “Split wood? Do they have a fireplace there? “ He says “No , I’m just a really bad bowler.”

A Cake Day Tradition

What do you call a fence post that gets used over and over? A re-post.

A burglar broke into our house last night…

I didn’t fight back, I just put the red laser dot on his forehead and the 3 cats did the rest. (Copied from a comment I saw to funny not to share since this whole sub is reposts)

What did Bullwinkle say to Rocky on December 25th?

Merry Christmoose!

What do Santa and Bill Cosby have in common

They only come when you are asleep.

I hate dark humor

The thought of a black man being funny shakes me to my very core

(Rewording an old joke): Kanye, Elon, and Trump in a bar.......

Kanye, Elon, and Trump are sitting in a crowded bar when the three stand up and loudly exclaim: Kanye yells "When I die, I want all of you to pour a shot of Hennessy on my grave in my memory" Elon yells "When I die, I want all of you to pour a shot of whiskey on my grave in my memory" Trump yells "When I die, I want all of you to pour a Diet Coke on my grave in my memory" One drunk stands up and says "Sure we can do that! But do you mind if it passes through our kidneys first?"

Why did the mathematician buy a 7-11?

Because it was prime real estate

I asked this nice girl a question the other day.

She was pretty, young, blond, had big tits and gave me a pleasant smile. I asked her if six inches satisfies? She grimaced and pondered, shifting her weight from foot to foot as if balancing the question and finally replied "no not really". So I ordered the seven inch pizza instead.

Breaking Down.

What do you cal Heisenberg with split personality disorder? Walter Egos! I’m sorry…

How many chef do you need to solve world hunger?

Depends on how you cook them

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