The funniest jokes the internet has to offer.

What Johnny Depp needs is not a vaccine…

He needs Heard Immunity.

What do you call a dog with no hind legs?

A doo.

R Kelly really be changing the rap game

He takes the art out of rap artist

A woman asks her husband

“Please go to the store and buy a gallon of milk for me and the baby. Not vodka. Not beer like last time!” Husband goes to the store. “What did she want from me?! Vodka? Beer? F-it, I’ll buy both.”

Rest in peace boiling water

You will soon be missed

Blonde lady driving down a dirt road…

When she sees another blonde woman in a row boat out in the middle of a cotton field. She slams on her brakes, fuming, and yells out to the lady in the boat “HEY!! IT’S DUMB BLONE BIMBOS LIKE YOU THAT GIVE BLONDES LIKE ME A BAD REPUTATION!! AND IF I COULD SWIM, I’D COME KICK YOUR ASS!!”

The nanny goat told her mate that she was pregnant.

She was kidding.

What is the opposite of a woman wearing a hijab?

A naked man wearing a blindfold.

What is a Karen called in Europe?

An American.

What would Amy Winehouse be doing if she were alive today?

Scratching at the lid of her coffin. ​ Too soon?

Local Drug Mart got robbed of all razor blades and skin lotion products with no clues left behind

Cops are on the lookout for a smooth criminal

My wife said you’re a pisces, you live outside of the box

I told her no, I live outside of the aquarium. She didn’t laugh :(

Where is the best place to get cremated?

Phoenix!