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The funniest jokes the internet has to offer.

New at better-not-say-it.com: Our hot joke section. Have fun laughing with our sensationally funny jokes:


Which flower is the clumsiest?

The whoopsy daisy!

Time traveler talks to a mathematician

The time traveler says, "Hello, in my grad school I have learned that it is impossible for any number which is a power greater than the second to be written as the sum of two like powers such as x^n + y^n = z^n for n > 2." "Show me how you proved it," the mathematician says. "Indeed! I studied it for my thesis." The time traveler, then, goes on with his proof. "Thank you, traveler, I wanted to take notes but right now I only have this book with a tiny margin."

What kind of church do Jewish Amphibians go to?

A Synafrogue

Did you hear about the Nyquil truck that collided with a Mucinex truck?

Amazingly, the entire area was congestion-free for over 8 hours

Where do they record all the dad jokes?

In the Daddabase.

Funny scene from God of War: Ragnarök

Mimir: “Brother, somewhere out there, there’s a riddle you’d enjoy. And I’m going to find it.” Kratos: “Do not-“ Mimir: “Once spoken, instantly broken! What am I?” Kratos: “Silence.” Mimir: “Correct!” Kratos: “I was not answering the riddle.”

Why do robots make bad fathers?

because they always nut and bolt

Sam Bankman-Fried has been arrested

He is now Sam Bankman-Jailed

When a Russian Oligarch jumps out a window

G-d closes a door.

What do you call a Spanish person wearing sandals?

Philippe Feloppe

Why are Catholics so upbeat after religious services?

Because they convert Mass into energy.

What do you call a guy with old hair?

Harold

Two blondes were taking their first train trip to Warsaw on the train...

A vendor came down the corridor selling bananas which they’d never seen before. Each bought one. The first one eagerly peeled the banana and bit into it just as the train went into a tunnel. When the train emerged from the tunnel, she looked across to her friend and said, “I wouldn’t eat that if I were you.” “Why not?” “I took one bite and went blind for half a minute.”

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