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The funniest jokes the internet has to offer.

New at better-not-say-it.com: Our hot joke section. Have fun laughing with our sensationally funny jokes:


Why does Snoop Dogg carry an umbrella?

Fo drizzle mah nizzle!

what do you call five black people tumbling down a hill??

Question: What do you call five black people tumbling down a hill while it’s raining? Answer: a mudslide

A Priest walks into a coal mine after hours.

He ask, “ where are all the miners?”

It just cost me £1 to put air in my tyres. It used to cost 20p.

I suppose that’s inflation for you.

I was constipated for a week

I had a huge back log.

Therapy

A man goes to a therapist and lays down on the couch. He tells the therapist "Lately I feel like nobody is paying attention to me". The therapist shouts: "NEXT PERSON"

What do you call four Latinos in quicksand?

Quatro Cinco

FRIDAY Thought

Does bleaching your Butt Hole Count as changing your ring tone

Vladimir Putin, Joe Biden, the pope and a 8 year old boy is on a airplane together

The airplane starts crashing, and they have to use parachutes to jump down to save themselves. One problem though: they only have three parachutes. Putin goes first and says: I am the smartest man in Russia, and the Russian people needs me! Then he takes a parachute, puts it on, and jumps. Then Biden says: I am the american president and the United States needs me! Then he takes a parachute, puts it on, and jumps. The pope says to the boy: I am a very old man hand have lived a long life, whilst you are still a child. Take the last parachute and save yourself. Then the boy says: There are a parachute for both of us. The smarted man in Russia took my backpack

Little tip for gardeners.

Throw a bottle of Whiskey, a bottle of gin and a bottle of vodka on your lawn. It will come up half cut.

What’s the difference between Amber Heard and your mom?

Nothing. I don’t know either one and don’t give a shit about them. Stop talking about them.

If I had a dollar for every time someone over 40 told me my generation sucks...

Then I could afford a house in the economy they ruined.

Why does my American friend got offended by 0.818181...?

9/11

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