The funniest jokes the internet has to offer.

My coworker just found out she won’t be able to attend next week’s Innuendo Conference…

I guess I’ll have to fill her slot instead.

Barrier To Entry

I hear the fencing community is having a problem with gatekeeping.

Where does 007 invest his money?

Bonds. Stocks and bonds.

I don’t like to brag about the expensive trips I go on…..

….but I went to the gas station today.

I asked my friend if he likes working

He said “I’ve held a lot of different job titles. I’ve been a doctor, a construction worker, a bartender, a plumber, a football player, a coach, a divorce lawyer, a real estate agent, a cab driver, owner of a pawn shop, a lifeguard, a mailman, a yoga instructor, a personal trainer, a teacher, a cop, a cowboy, a truck driver and was the boss of a small company.” I said “wow, that sounds really stressful.” He said “not really, after all it’s just sex on camera”

I like dillos, but I don’t support giving them guns because...

I would never armadillo.

Why do Mexicans cross the border in pairs?

The sign says "No trespassing"

How is a lightbulb different than a pregnant woman?

You can unscrew a lightbulb.

Have you heard of the dog that committed suicide?

He had a ruff life

If having sex for money makes you a whore,

Does having sex for free make you a non-profit whorganisation?

My grumpy fat friend got mad when I asked him if he woke up on the wrong side of the bed

I guess he woke up on both sides of the bed

A performer fell through the floor

It was just a stage he was going through

Why is eating pussy like dealing with the Mafia

One slip of the tongue and your in deep shit.