Things better not said - our best

Your mom is so old
She has a separate entrance for black guys

Why are shooting stars so fast? (x-post from /dadjokes)
They’re traveling light.

I was doing a calculation on my calculator and accidentally divided instead of multiplying.
Operator error

Why has Russia failed to take Ukraine?
Because it is a Donbas war.

English is weird
It can be understood through tough thorough thought, though.

Did you know that in the 1800s there was a childminder that used to give all of her wards a sweet with a bit of opium in it? Hence the phrase “Have *sweet* dreams?
You: Really? Me: Nah it’s just that “Have *salty* dreams sounded a bit sus.”

My girlfriend likes my dick
More than hers...

What does life insurance and a bukkake have in common?
They both have you covered.

In toy story 4, What do you call a fork that talks?
A: A fork Wall.

wanna know what happens when you give a politician viagra?
He gets taller

Hey, I know a joke:
A squirrel walks up to a tree and says, "I forgot to store acorns for winter and now I am dead." Ha! It is funny because the squirrel gets dead! -Doug

did you know that Ukraine has no Walmarts?
only targets.

What’s the difference between the Wild West and New York State?
In New York they’re still shooting up Buffalo