Things better not said - our best
... Jokes ...Why did the shed not break down?
Because it was washed away by the pipe
Why do podiatrists make great detectives?
Because they can always sense when trouble is afoot.
What would be inherently more popular if it wasn’t for the U.S.A?
The German Language.
You started without me!?
Two guys are about to get down and dirty…
One of them says “hey I need to go get a drink of water first. Do NOT start without me!”
The other guy says “bro.. I promise I won’t”
A few mins later he excitedly comes back with his glass of water and sees that there is cum sprayed all over the wall!
He says “Bro!! I asked you to please not start without me!”
The other guys says “Dude chill bro…. I just farted”
Why is McDonald’s the best place to bring your girlfriend?
So you can get to court-her pound-hers.
Who knew?
Clinton was exposed by Lewinsky. Nixon was exposed by Woodward and Bernstein.
What do Christianity and Mexican pornography have in common?
The coming of Jesus
I tried to join the Marines.
But I fell short of their physical requirements. So they put me in the Navy since I was a sub-marine.
Me: “just going to South Manchester to pick up my trousers”
Friend: “Altrincham?”
Me: “No just had them dry cleaned”
You walk into a bar and there’s a line of people all waiting to slug you in the face…
That’s it. That’s the punch line