Things better not said - our best
... Jokes ...Best man speech jokes?
I love my partner but he’s going to get boo’d out of the wedding/state of Florida if he continues on with the speech he’s got written out lol.
Anyone have any good, original, funny material?
Of all the animals in the Australian outback, which is the greatest singer?
The koala-la-la-la-la!
What do you call the nurse who’s knees are always dirty when she leaves the doctors private office?
Head nurse.
I heard about the ideal gas law in physics class PV=nRT…
and I heard non-ideal gas law in a crowded elevator PU=faRT
you know who Gunther IV hired as manager of the Pisa Soccer team?
Ted Lassie
Why did the apple break up with the orange?
Because the banana was more appealing.
Super Bowl Fun
It’s the Super Bowl, and a man makes his way to his seat right next to the 50 yard line. He sits down, noticing that the seat next to him is empty. He leans over and asks his neighbor if someone will be sitting there. ‘No,’ says the neighbor. ‘The seat is empty. ‘This is incredible,’ said the man. ‘Who in their right mind would have a seat like this for the Super Bowl and not use it?’ The neighbor says, ‘Well actually the seat belongs to me. I was supposed to come with my wife, but she passed away. This is the first Super Bowl we haven’t been to together since we got married. ’ ‘Oh, I’m so sorry to hear that. That’s terrible….But couldn’t you find someone else, a friend, relative or even a neighbor to take her seat?’ The man shakes his head. ‘No,’ he says. ‘They’re all at the funeral.’
I read the dictionary the other day
At the start you think it’s the aardvark, but by the end it turns out the zebra did it.