Things better not said - our best
... Jokes ...I was down at a pub quiz with some friends.
I was down at a pub quiz with some friends the other night and there came an entire section on the Witcher.
So I turned to my friend Gerald of Trivia to see if he knew anything
What did the Onion ask the Garlic for during their divorce?
Allium-ony.
Why do most American Vegans live in Dallas?
Because Dallas spelled backwards is Sallad.
Yea gas prices are going up but there’s still one thing that goes down every day
Yo mama
3 men are stranded in the desert
A blind man, an amputee, and a man in a wheelchair. They’d been walking for hours and they crest a sand dune and to their surprise there’s a beautiful oasis. So all 3 men travel to it, the amputee jumps in, when he steps out he looks at his arm and it had grown back. Amazed he leads the blind man in and tells as he come out the other side he can astonishingly see again. The 2 men grab the man in the wheelchair and push him through the oasis as he comes out the other side… New tires!
I was fired after falling asleep.
Being diagnosed with narcolepsy ended my career as a skydiving instructor.
Why did the baker have 13 ovens?
They liked to have rebundant systems!
My friends are nice but kinda dumb.
I was just invited to a surprise party for myself.