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I’m back with another shitty joke for y’all. So an armed man runs into a real estate agency and screams…

NOBODY MOVE!!!

What’s a whaler’s favorite part of a woman?

Harpoon

What do you call a deer with no eyes?

What do you call a deer with no eyes? No Idea. What do you call a deer with no eyes and no legs? Still No Idea. What do you call a deer with no eyes, no legs and no penis? Still No Fucking Idea.

Did Adam & Eve ever had a date?

No. They only had a fig!

Robin Hood goes into a bar

Right away an attractive woman chats him up, he asks "would you like to get out of here and go into the forest with me?" She winks and replies, "Sherwood!"

With the increasing price and size of Iphones……

If you want to be an iPhone user in 10 years, you’ll need to have deep pockets. ( first time here, I hope is not too bad)

Justice is a dish best served cold...

...because if it was served warm then it would be justwater!

My friend Jack got busted performing sexual favors in his sports club’s locker room…

Now Jack’s off the team.

Did you hear about the man who got hit by a milk truck?

He got creamed.

A man asked a Chinese girl for her number. She said, "S*x! S*x! S*x! Free s*x tonight!"

A man asked a Chinese girl for her number. She said, "Sex! Sex! Sex! Free sex tonight!" The man said, "Wow!" Then her friend said, "She means 666-3629."

I heard Taylor Swift wrote a song about her airplane miles controversy

It’s called 747

Harvard had reports of a black bear walking around the dorms

So of course they had to remove it and replace it with a white straight man.

A male who acts feminist in order to hook up with them

Whamenizer

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