The Postman

Walter the mail carrier was delivering mail and a few packages to Mrs. Petersen, a gorgeous housewife, right before Christmas. Mrs. Petersen was stunning and always had a kind word, unlike her arrogant prick of a husband. It was a cold morning, and as Walter was dropping off her mail, Mrs. Petersen appeared in the doorway, wearing a silk robe and not much else. “Walter, it’s awfully cold outside. How about a nice hot cup of coffee?” Walter eagerly accepted her kind offer. Once he was in the kitchen, she said, “Since you’re here, how about a few eggs?” “Sure, Mrs. Peterson, that’d be great!” “I’ll throw in some toast and some a few thick Polish sausages too.” Afterwards, she was leaning over him refilling his mug, giving Walter a glorious view, and she said, “How about dessert?” “What did you have in mind, Mrs. Petersen?” “How about we go upstairs and have a nice roll in hay?” “That sounds like a fine idea,” said Walter, and off they went. After a spectacular lovemaking session, they were lying in the afterglow. Mrs. Peterson said, “Oh, I almost forgot!” She reached in the bedside table and pulled out a crisp one dollar bill and handed it to Walter. “What’s this for?” Walter inquired. “Well, this morning as Mr. Petersen was on his way to work, I reminded him that Christmas is coming, and I suggested we do something for you, Walter, because you’re such a great mail carrier. Mr. Petersen thought for a second, and then said, ‘Fuck him. Give him a buck.’ So there you have it!”