Not so fast…

The captain of a navy vessel is on the bridge one day when the bosun enters and asks to use the PA system. The captain agrees and the bosun gets on the PA and barks out “Attention seaman first class Johnson! Your mother is dead!! That is all!” The Captain is mortified and grabs hold of the boson “What the hell is the matter with you man!?! That was downright cruel! The next time you get horrible news like that you need to be a lot more sensitive to the crew! You simply cannot be that blunt!” The bosun looks perplexed but responds “Aye aye captain!” and leaves the bridge. A few weeks later the bosun returns to the bridge and asks to use the PA system. The captain agrees and the bosun announces “Now hear this! All able bodied seamen assemble on deck IMMEDIATELY and form up in a line!! That is all!” Curious, the captain leans out of the bridge to hear what’s going on. Down below, the bosun barks an order: “All men who’s mothers are still alive take one step forward! NOT SO FAST ABERNATHY!!!”