So this guy graduated from college, but he’s still a virgin…

He wants to lose his virginity so he decides he’ll go to a strip club and lose it there. It’s a big moment in his life and he’s nervous so he calls up his best friend. He says, “Hey man, today’s the day. Im going to the strip club to lose my virginity and I want you to come with me.” His best friend is like, “Oh dude! Of course! I’m there. Just do me a favor and don’t get this lady named Sandpaper Sally.” Our guy says, “Yea, whatever.” So then he calls his dad up saying, “Dad. It’s time. I’m ready to become a man, I’m ready to lose my virginity. I’m going to the strip club and I want you to come with me.” His dad says, “Son, I couldn’t be more proud. It would be an honor to go with you on this day. But do your old man a favor and don’t get this lady named Sandpaper Sally...” So his best friend and his dad go over to his house. They get dressed up, Gucci’d up, smelling good, and then they head to the club. They get there, pay the owner the money and the owner lines all the girls up. So our guy walks the line a couple of times and chooses the best looking girl in there and guess who it was: Sandpaper Sally. So he takes her in the back room. He gets naked, she gets naked, he’s nervous but he’s committed so he gets to work. He’s digging her out but, he stops and goes, “Oh Sally, you’re so hard and dry. You’re like a desert, what’s your problem?” She goes, “I can fix that.” She goes to the bathroom. 15 minutes later she comes back. He’s really nervous now, but still committed, so he gets back to work. He’s beating down walls when he says, “Oh Sally, you’re so hot and wet, what did you do?” And she says, “I picked my scabs.”